How many of you have made yourself smaller so that people around can be more comfortable? How many times have you said yes or no in ways you do not want? How many times have you told them, “It’s okay” when you know it is not?
How many of you don’t talk about your aspiration because you do are scared people might judge you for thinking so big? So, you keep your dreams and talents to yourself, procrastinate, play small, roll out the red carpet for others before retreating into the crowd.
DON’T MISS: The Truth No One Told You About Following Dreams
Maybe you have done these. I have too even though it is something I am still working on. Growing up, I was such a people-pleaser. I worried so much about what people thought of me. You know how people just hate you for no reason? I didn’t want that. So, I tried as much as I could to be in everyone’s good book even when it was so uncomfortable for me.
“You didn’t like what I posted on Facebook? I am sorry, I will take it down”.
“You are tired of hearing about my filmmaking dreams? I am sorry for being selfish. Please, tell me about your dreams instead”.
“Why would want to date me when I am not so pretty?”
Like me, how many times have you let these words out in a desperate attempt to avoid conflict? You pretend that your feelings and desires are not valid because they make someone else uncomfortable?
If you are guilty of this, STOP IT!
Every time you say “It’s fine” when it is not, you train yourself to think, “My opinion or desire does not matter”. The more you make excuses for people for treating you the way do, the smaller you will become. Those unwarranted apologies you are quick to give will slowly swallow your self-esteem.
People will only treat you the way you treat yourself. If you keep belittling yourself, people around will be comfortable pushing you down so they can stand up. And you cannot blame them because that is how you see yourself. Small. Little. Unworthy. You have taught them that you do not matter as much as they do.
Soon you will find yourself refusing to speak up in a meeting because you are afraid your idea is whack. You will agree with every tom, dick, and harry that your dreams are not visible, so, you might as well drop them.
Or in some cases, you are refusing to talk about your new promotion because people might think you are “Bragging”. So, you keep everything to yourself even though every fiber of your being wants to scream about your achievements.
It took me quite some time to realize that “Not everyone will like me or understand and support my dreams” and that is perfectly okay. The more you try to please people, the more you lose yourself.
Stop stuffing your opinions and dreams into the closet.
Stop telling people “It is okay” when you know it is not.
Have your boundaries and don’t allow people to cross it.
Stop playing small to satisfy anyone’s ego
Start talking about the milestones you have achieved no matter how small.
Quit keeping your gifts or talents to yourself. Show the world who you are. Don’t be scared to be different.
Stop thinking you are not good enough.
Stop shrinking yourself.
You deserve to be seen and heard. Own your personality. It is our different personalities that make this world an interesting place to stay. So, why hide yours?
We only have a limited amount of time to spend here on earth, why should you be scared to go after your passion? Why settle for the norm? Why live your life according to the word, “Should”?
You are a priceless work of art and like every other human on earth, you matter. Do not be scared to put your dazzling self on display. Chase your dreams and celebrate each milestone.
Stop living silently! Stop Shrinking Yourself So Others Can Feel Comfortable