Why I Think Young People Should Go Through The “Hoe Phase”

Why I Think Young People Should Go Through The "Hoe Phase"

Do you think young people must go through the “hoe phase” before they finally settle down with one partner?

I once had this discussion with a friend and my answer was, “Yes. I think the hoe phase is an experience everyone should have before getting married”.  Before you get judgmental, hear me out.

But first, what is a “Hoe Phase?” According to Urban Dictionary,

A hoe phase is that phase in a phase in someone’s life when they are fine with exploring promiscuous activities and connecting with random people. The activities may not always end in sex. You might just be flirting non-stop, dancing provocatively with strangers, as well as kissing and making out with random people. The phase helps you find out your likes and dislikes in a partner; you get to explore your sexuality, and know yourself better”. And again, just because “hoe” is attached does not mean it is only ladies that get to experience it. Men too are involved.

So, here is the reason why I think every young person deserves to go through the hoe phase.

The phase is necessary for anyone naturally curious and adventurous. It is in your nature to always seek something more, to always wonder what is at the other end of the tunnel. And the only healthy way you can do that is to explore when you are single with no responsibilities of being a wife or a husband. The fun part is – you get to do all these on your terms. You get to fuck, flirt, make out with whoever you want.

When people who are naturally inquisitive don’t explore much before getting married, they usually realize on the long run that they should have experienced more people. They begin to wonder if they would have met someone better if they had explored. Then they try to satisfy their curiosity and in the process, they cheat.

So, why not mingle with as many persons as you want now that you are single?

Another reason why I think every young person should go through the hoe phase is this – it is a great opportunity to discover yourself, explore your sexuality and know what you like and don’t like in a partner.  I’d use myself as an example. From the few guys I have mingled with, I have a better understanding of my love language, I know how I want to be touched and made love to and I know the qualities I like in a partner.

Without passing through the “hoe phase”, how would will I know all these? The point is to experience a lot of people so that when you finally decide to snap out of the phase, you will have enough clarity as to what you want in your next relationship.

Some people may not go through the “hoe phase”. They are okay dating just one person in their lifetime and getting married to them. It is totally fine as long as they don’t step out of their marriage in search of something more.

Others might go through the hoe phase and get carried away. It’s always fun when you are not committed to anyone; you are not dealing with the stress that comes with relationships, not answering to anybody. You just live on your terms.

It takes a lot of self-discipline to put an end to the “hoe phase” thing. But one thing still stands out; it is a phase any curious mind should pass through before settling down.

They are the ones that will likely come up with a lot of “What ifs” if they don’t get to explore. There is nothing wrong with wanting to hoe out as long as you are single and you are protecting yourself. Enjoy it while it lasts. One day, you will look back and smile at the memories.

Get to know why ladies are more attracted to bad boys.

4 Replies to “Why I Think Young People Should Go Through The “Hoe Phase”

  1. Truthfully, the hoe phase is really what every youths gats to experience before setting down, because it helps you understand yourself better and know whom you would want to settle down with.

  2. Does the “hoe phase” go against biblical conjunctions and Christian upbringing? How do one get to go through this phase without feeling a bridge in moral obligations/ commitments? Does this phase make one less of a Christian?

  3. Everyone is entitled to his/her opinion. But, I don’t think it’s right. Human problem from inception is that they become over obsess of their future. Doing a “Hoe Phase” task is the leeway of wasting time on people that you wouldn’t be needing for a long time. If you think it’s not a waste of time. It’s definitely a Big one. Aside that, you might not like the situation when you love the person that has different perspective from your thoughts. Some guys and girls put themselves on a tough discipline so that they can achieve a climax at least before giving in to intimate relationship. It would be hard for someone who had gone through a series of “Hoe Phase” to cope. Imagine how irritating it is for a guy/girl to give a series of persons he/she has had hoe phase with. It would sound disgusting even if they tag it friends. It’s just great one remains firm waiting for the right person. Love doesn’t persist for a long time. But if a lady or guy is a virgin, it’s a boast for him/her when confrontation occurs in the future. It’s one’s pride, you know?

  4. Well Everyone has their own thoughts and opinions and are all right but for me I couldn’t agree more with the writer. One needs exploring before settling down. Most marriages have crashed because of this. Most times they feel that they have been left out or have some things they never got to try and will never get to try because they are now married. I feel the youthful age is for exploration and it does not have to end up in sex and even if it does well its an experience. Just be careful while going through this stage.

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